I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
