Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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