Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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