I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
