I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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