So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize