Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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