She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
