I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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