Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
