I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
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We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
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I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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