4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
