No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
