So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I wish i was in the wii world.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
