i was rollin on her like bob the builder
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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