pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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