dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
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I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
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Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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