3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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