all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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