They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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