you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
