He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I wear drunk well.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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