I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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