ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
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it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
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After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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