Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize
