Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
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