Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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