shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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