we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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