HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
The power of my boobs compel you
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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