I think i sorta joined a cult last night
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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