oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
