just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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