That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
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