I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
