you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
We had sex on a dog bed..
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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