I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Randomize
