i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
