so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
