For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
