well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
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