why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
