i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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