is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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