thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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