almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
wow bdsm is so cute
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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