RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize