Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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