just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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