how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
